Am I having sex with my cat?

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Wednesday April 25, 2007 · 11:25 PM PDT

2007/04/25 · 23:25

I've got two cats. One male. One female. They are my first pets, even though I'm in retirement age. I've had them for 5 years. Pookie, the female and Muddy, the male.

I've had Muddy since he was a kitten, and rescued Pookie from the Humane Society as a very young cat. They are typical cats. Unique personalities.
Indepedent. Gorgeous.

So, that's the back story. I need help from my cat loving friends, however, here at dkos because I think I am having sex with my cat. But I'm not sure.

Ghost of Frank Zappa

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Wednesday March 14, 2007 · 12:04 PM PDT

2007/03/14 · 12:04

Hello, and please turn on your television to C Span II immediately. The Senate is speaking on the war, and so far I've heard Nelson, Cardin and Lindsay Graham. It's fireworks. So tune it in. It's for real. Good debate.

Graham came up with a novel theory, that as bad as George W. Bush and his policies have been, and they certainly have been bad, they will only increase by a factor of ten if the Democrats have their way.

That's a nice base ya got there Lindsay. For your persuasive argument. Sure it's a total cluster fuck. We all agree on this, BUT, you people who said we should have never gone in in the first place will only make it worse. Trust me.

I will delete this if necessary. Just troll rate my tip jar to give me a sign.

Thanks,

GoFZ

Ghost of Frank Zappa

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Monday February 26, 2007 · 6:27 AM PST

2007/02/26 · 06:27

This is entirely sincere. I just saw the report that James Cameron, the director of Titanic, has documentary evidence of the Christ family tomb. Da Baby Jeebus had a wife and a child.

MSNBC will be covering the press conference sometime this morning. I repeat this is not a joke.

This will not go well with the fundies at all. This either undercuts the entire Biblical account of the life of Christ, or this is the best public fraud since the Hitler diary.

That's my best estimation.

Poll

275 votes Show Results

Do You Believe what Cameron presented?

275 votes Vote Now!

Do You Believe what Cameron presented?

Yes

56 votes

51 votes

Unlikely

54 votes

Likely

30 votes

Indifferent

75 votes

Hostile to the presentation

9 votes

Ron Paul a Republican from TEXAS devastates Bush

Ghost of Frank Zappa

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Thursday February 15, 2007 · 1:52 AM PST

2007/02/15 · 01:52

I just listened to one of the bravest, most eloquent and honest speeches I've ever heard. I'm doing the late night thing with C Span on in the background when I hear some really strong words that are giving me a boner, so I rush in to see which one of our Dems are finally getting some cojones and it's a REPUBLICAN. From TEXAS.

More after the break.....

Poll

474 votes Show Results

Ron Paul - Real American?

474 votes Vote Now!

Ron Paul - Real American?

I only regret that I have but one life ..... kinda guy

341 votes

Wolf in sheep's clothing

133 votes

Impeachment Porn

Ghost of Frank Zappa

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Tuesday December 26, 2006 · 4:33 PM PST

2006/12/26 · 16:33

As the Bush twins retrieved their soiled undergarments after a typical night of entertaining as many South American lotharios as can be "entertained" by two overly indulged, under supervised, drunken sluts, their father meanwhile was preparing for the ultimate sexual experience. He was going to be cornholed by 300,000,000 American, simultaneously.

Now, cornholed may seem like a crude word, but actually it's more acceptable here than the actual "I" word which is truly so dirty that it may not even be thought of let alone spoken.

Here's how it went down.

As George lay in bed naked, dreaming his pleasant, recurring dream of black people drowning in New Orleans, he awoke with a start. It was a drumbeat. Boom Boom Boom..... off in the distance.... a drum beat that he kept hearing...... seemingly everywhere he went. Like a jungle drum. Did George have Jungle Fever? Maybe dipping into Condyloma Rice had "changed" him.

But no, that wasn't it. It wasn't Jungle Fever. Though he certainly was hot for Condyloma. No, the drumbeat was something more sinister. More dirty. More filthy. More pornograhic.

Ghost of Frank Zappa

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Thursday November 23, 2006 · 9:20 AM PST

2006/11/23 · 09:20

On this Thanksgiving, in the spirit of the season, I am compelled to share with (corporeal) mankind, something that will warm the cockles of any heart. It is news, and not just any news, but news from on high of a wonderful and momentous occurence. A rare and marvelous event.

As many of you know, I am a Ghost. I am working on my Archangel badge. And being the bearer of news of great import is one of the 9 steps.

With this in mind and without further ado, I present to you...... all of mankind..... on this Thanksgiving ..... WONDERFUL NEWS.

Ghost of Frank Zappa

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Tuesday November 07, 2006 · 11:00 PM PST

2006/11/07 · 23:00

Gonna be a dental floss tycoooooooooon.

We win....both houses..... the moment Tester's number come in.

Whooooooooooooooppppppppeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Yaaaaaaaaaaahhhhoooooooooooooooooooo Read More

WE WIN .... MOTHERFUCKERS..... YEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAYY

Ghost of Frank Zappa

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Tuesday November 07, 2006 · 7:58 PM PST

2006/11/07 · 19:58

MSNBC just announced that WE WIN the house. This diary is for foul mouth bad boys and girls who want to gloat.....

More after the fold.... Read More

Goebbels was a brilliant speaker and politician.

Ghost of Frank Zappa

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Friday October 20, 2006 · 7:55 PM PDT

2006/10/20 · 19:55

And so is Karl Rove.

I watched Herr Rove tonight. He spoke in Buffalo (on CSPAN) for Congressman Tom Reynolds. Since nobody else would speak for Reynolds. And Karl was good. Real good. If I didn't know he was lying I might be swayed by his arguments.

You've seen the spooky Osama bin Laden, "These are the Stakes" ads already. And we've all heard the faux cowboy and his puppetmaster that shot his friend in the face speak about the stakes. But to hear Rove is almost a pleasure. Like Goebbels he is a master of the gentle art, as Mark Twain called lying. It's done with a straight face and firmness. No room whatsoever for doubt. No quirks. No smirks.

What he said is the sum total of the Republican message, and it will be hammered over and over. Read more, please. Read More

All Foley, All the Time on CNN

Ghost of Frank Zappa

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Monday October 02, 2006 · 2:54 PM PDT

2006/10/02 · 14:54

Fret not, brothers and sisters, CNN at the very least has taken hold of this dreadful story and is shaking the trees for any and all angles. Cafferty had a blistering editorial. John King made it clear that this is a very big story and it is not going away, and it is likely to have a very large effect on the November elections.

Hastert allowed an interview with some CNN chick. He says he can't remember ever having a meeting about this matter. Not that it didn't happen (she asked) but that he couldn't remember, as it may have been brought up in the course of a day when multiple items were discussed at a meeting. She followed up with something to the effect that .... "does this happen frequently enough that it wouldn't raise an immediate red flag or did you just think it wasn't important enough to remember?" Hastert didn't like that.

And one of the Stepford hags jumps ship..... after the fold. Read More

Let's Get Ready to Ruuuuuumbbbbbbllllle.

Ghost of Frank Zappa

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Friday September 29, 2006 · 8:20 PM PDT

2006/09/29 · 20:20

Now is the time for all good men and women to come to the aid of the party. The Democratic Party. The proudly liberal, progressive Democratic Party.

The singlemost important election in the history of the United States of America is just a month away, and we, the Sons and Daughters of the Sons of Liberty are going to have much to say about the outcome of the elections.

We CAN save our country. Together. United.

Here is what I plan to do, and I beg, beseech and implore with heartfelt sincerity that you heed my plan. And join me.

As of this moment I am not going to write a diary that is not necessary. If it does not contribute directly to the election of progressive liberal candidates for office then I have nothing diary worthy to say. No meta diaries from me. Until after the elections. My reasoning on the flip. I'm sure you'll agree Read More

Atomic Bomb Dropped Today : Explodes on Bush's Head

Ghost of Frank Zappa

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Monday September 25, 2006 · 6:08 PM PDT

2006/09/25 · 18:08

Look out folks there are going to be a TON of diaries on Keith Olberman's Special Comments.

Am I having sex with my cat?

There's skirmishing at Lexington..... the Senate speaks. live blog

BREAKING: MSNBC Reports Tomb of Jesus and his FAMILY found.

Ron Paul a Republican from TEXAS devastates Bush

Impeachment Porn

I come bearing gifts. A cornucopia.

Movin to Montana soon

WE WIN .... MOTHERFUCKERS..... YEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAYY

Goebbels was a brilliant speaker and politician.

All Foley, All the Time on CNN

Let's Get Ready to Ruuuuuumbbbbbbllllle.

Atomic Bomb Dropped Today : Explodes on Bush's Head